All I could think after last week was … is this actually going to happen; are we going to really watch this show this week after the last two weeks went from terrible to brutal? Well, since I’m writing this I guess you have your answer! Tuesday night we were back to our usual time slot, but the rest of the show – from limited time in the ‘red room’ to highlighting family members in the audience – remained pretty much the same. Once again, the odds were stacked against each contestant as the majority were performing for the final time on the Idol stage. And once again what the judges said seemed more in sync with some pre-scribed notes than what was actually happening on stage, but that isn’t surprising, because this … is American Idol!

A couple of random thoughts before getting into each song…
– The way the judges talk, you would think there are thousands of songs to choose from and that everything about what happens onstage and with the music is all up to the contestant. You might also think the moon is made of cheese, but that doesn’t make that true either. The reality is that the show only secures the performance rights for a certain number of songs and from that list the contestants pick three songs, from which the producers choose the song the signers perform. As Randy would say ‘Wot’? That’s right – while the judges are partly correct in placing responsibility for choosing songs on the singers, they are hamstrung by a limited selection – imagine having five people do the same song – and by the producers having the final selection. If you don’t think this is done to position winners and losers, grab me some nice moon-cheese and say hello to Grommit while you’re there.
– It is only the third time we’ve done this, yet the format is tired and predictable: a few ‘cannon fodder’ entries to warm up the crowd, a few ‘contenders’ mixed with one favorite in the middle, and the one the producers want to make absolutely sure makes it through in the ‘glory spot’ at the end. It seems completely obvious to me that this is the person who was alone in a room with producers and coaches 90% of the week while kids like Alex said ‘hey, can I get some help here?’.
– Oh, and a final thought on the format – while it is made to seem as thought they are doing this to get ‘America involved sooner’, don’t buy it for a second. Only passing on 3 out of 12 each time means that folks really need to vote for their favorites. The side effect of this is that the only drama is which of the second tier people makes it into that last spot. There is no room for a real ‘dark horse’ – and more importantly no room for anyone the producers don’t want to make the Top 12. If you don’t think this is true, think for a second – the producers decide the order, have final song choice, we know from past seasons that coaching time isn’t equal, and clearly the judges are trying to ‘game’ the performance impressions … and even the final clips are chosen to reflect the lasting image they want voters to have, not the best moments of each singer.

PERFORMANCE SHOW

Just to reiterate for the last time – the format is structured so that we get about 18 minutes of singing spread over two hours. This week, once again we fill the remaining 112 minutes with Ryan talking to the singers and seeing their clips (~30 minutes), more tedious dreck from the judges (~40 minutes), and more commercials (~42 minutes). So let’s get to looking at the smallest (but supposedly most important) time component of the show – the singing.

Von Smith – “You’re All I Need to Get By” by Marvin Gaye
Von is cannon fodder. My wife hopes he gets some money to fix his sister’s teeth.

Taylor Vaifanua – “If I Got You” by Alicia Keyes
At this point we were thinking that the cannon fodder entries weren’t as atrocious as previous weeks. Yet they are still disposable … and Taylor is going home.

Alex Wagner-Trugman – “I Guess That’s Why They Call It The Blues” by Elton John
Just in case any of Alex’s charm wore off on the audience (I know my wife is pulling for him), the judges were very, very harsh – and the final footage wasn’t flattering at all. Sorry Alex – the judges say you gotta go now.

Arianna Asfar – “Winner Takes It All” by ABBA
It took me a while to figure out what she was singing … it is one thing to tinker with the melody, but most of these folks – and apparently the coaches as well – are inept at doing it, because there are actual classes taught on how to do ‘theme and variations’, and last time I checked ‘sing a bunch of random scale notes’ wasn’t a proper technique. Buh-bye.

Ju’Not Joyner – “Delilah” by Plain White T’s
He sings well, but the song and arrangement are dreary and while the style is restrained, tehre is no power behind it. He fails as a mid-session contender and will go home.

Kristen McNamara — “Give Me One Reason” by Tracy Chapman
She sings well but her voice lacks the stylistic range to manage the song and she butchers the final ‘glory note’. Besides which, her dismal personality from ‘group night’ shines through.

Nathaniel Marshall – “I Would Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That)” by Meatloaf
I would pull for him as the last remaining train-wreck except that I genuinely dislike him based on his overexposure (with Kristen) during group night. It is interesting that while the judges tore apart Nick for his theatrics they merely call Nate’s persona ‘distracting’.

Felicia Barton – “No One” by Alicia Keyes
I was almost surprised that they mentioned that she got a second chance after being dumped. Of course they didn’t mention that she got that chance because the producers had been caught with their hands in the cookie jar with a contestant who was more of a ‘plant’ than Carly Smithson was last year … Joanna Pacitti. Sadly she ruins her chances with a mediocre performance and too many bad notes for the judges to ignore, though they did gloss them over.

Scott MacIntyre – “Mandolin Rain” by Bruce Hornsby
Scott is the blind guy who still manages more stage prescence than half the other performers in the top 36. He sings well, but not perfectly … but is clearly the judges’ pick for the #3 slot. Stuff they criticize in others they turn to praise for Scott.

Kendall Beard – “This One’s For The Girls” by Martina McBride
She actually gave one of the worst vocals of the night – out of tune too often, showing a limited range and very screechy … yet did it in a style and with an energy that is going to net her loads of votes. I don’t think she’ll make the top 12, but I would be surprised if she isn’t back on Thursday for the wild card round.

Jorge Nunez — “Don’t Let The Sun Go Down On Me” by Elton John
Jorge sang very well after a rather odd-sounding start, and was my choice for the #1 male slot until I saw the clip they used at the end of the show. It was not nearly as good as what he actually did (they use clips from the rehearsal), and might actually cost him a trip home.

Lil Rounds – “Be Without You” by Mary K. Blige
Whew. I bet the producers are breathing a sigh of relief – all of the pushing in the early stages, the nuggets in Hollywood week, and putting her in the glory spot tonight. She paid them back with what was clearly the best performance of the night. I can’t stand Mary J. Blige, but Lil sings very well and powerfully … and is a safe bet for the female top 12 spot.

My predictions based on the performances?
– Top Male – Scott MacIntyre
– Top Female – Lil Rounds
– Other Finalist – Jorge Nunez
– Wild Card Entry – Kendall Beard

I will leave these untouched and continue after the results show.

One final thought … on the judges.

– Simon couldn’t even remember the names of folks singing tonight – that is just laziness to the point of insulting. Paula, on the other hand, alternated between an inability to construct sentences and pulling out detailed analysis from Hollywood week and before (which means weeks and months ago). Yeah Paula, we all know you get fed notes and ideas, perhaps make it less obvious. The four judge panel seemed quiet useless and like two-too-many this week … there were always two ‘what he/she saids’ for each singer.

RESULTS SHOW

For this last round , I’ll do exactly what I did for the last two … so before we see which three of the twelve dismal finalists make the top twelve, I’ll just talk about the show a bit. Again, with an hour to fill out (well, about 40 minutes after commercials) and only a few minutes of actual content there was sure to be loads of filler. Here is how it went:
– We started off with yet another tedious look at ‘how they got here’. Again … these are just silly fluff pieces of kids jumping up and down with their Golden Tickets.
– Then the banter with the judges and a couple of contestants. I have expect to see Simon checking his email or something when the camera pans back …
– This week’s group sing was a Katie Perry song I’d never heard before (no surprise) but that the rest of the family universally despised … and I have now joined that assessment.
– Just like last week, the first person they brought down immediately got placed into the top 12. No surprise, either.
– Quickly (well, after loads of commercials) they set up the remainder of the bottom row to compete, then whittled things quickly to a pair-up that focused on the ‘other top vote getter’ slot. Was I right? Find out … after the break!
– Soon after, they picked off the top row two at a time, bringing us down to the final two … so who would get the ‘top male’ slot? Surprisingly we didn’t have to wait – they announced the last fan-chosen finalist and spent the last twenty minutes on commercials … oh, and handing out the eight Wild Card slots.

Again the structure was similar to last week – Ryan would call folks to stand up and talk about their performance, then the singer and judges would all chat for a moment before they would get summarily dismissed more often than not (75% of the time, as I mentioned before). This week definitely felt faster paced, and when they spent one-third doing the Wild Card announcements I understood.

The first person named to the Top 12 was Lil Rounds, who seemed to have had some mixed reviews until she belted out the song last night. She was clearly the best female vocalist and deserved her slot.

The two people competing for a spot mid-show were Scott and Kendall. No surprise for me – Scott walked away with it … I was, however, surprised that even after showing a clip of her singing grossly out of tune nothing negative was said about Kendall.

The final pair was Jorge and Ju’Not … I have to admit that I expected them to drag out Nate to have him blubber on national television one final time before dashing his dream once and for all. It was nice to have two serious contenders together … even though there was no surprise for me that Jorge went through. Three for three … first time I managed that!

So who do we have so far?
– Guys: Danny, Michael, Adam, Kris, Scott and Jorge
– Girls: Alexis, Alison and Lil

So now on to the Wild Cards … they brought about twenty of the finalists into the red room and gave each judge two chances to announce who they were choosing to sing again tomorrow. There were four girls and four guys:
– Von Smith, Ricky Braddy, Matt Giraud, Anoop Desai
– Tatiana Del Toro, Jasmine Murray, Megan Corkrey, Jesse Langseth

The question for me … how important is it to the producers to balance the guy to girl ratio? If it matters, note that there are already six guys – that would mean that three of four girls would go through and no guys. That seems unlikely to me … I won’t begin to speculate who goes through … but the family if hoping FOR Anoop, and AGAINST Tatiana and Jasmine.  And a final thought there – while Simon actually woke up long enough to chime in about how this process is fair and necessary and has produced the likes of Clay Aiken and Jennifer Judson, the reality is that the list has some deserving folks, but more are ‘hey we told you to vote for them’ picks and some for ratings value.  In other words, same-ole, same-ole.

Join me again tomorrow when I report the results of the Wild Card show and reveal the Top 12!

Tags: Misc, Television