CoDMW2 – A Difficult Question
Wasif asks: I’m 15 years old and my dad is making a huge deal about me playing Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. He even took it away after just a couple of weeks of playing it. I honestly (and i’m not leaving out any details) do not understand why. … Now that it’s gone, I’ve asked my dad for it several times and he tells me that these games are addictive and nothing more than mindless killing. I know this is because my dad is a psychiatrist and he deals with people who have addictions to this everyday. He sees people who are addicted to this game and believes that I am one of them, when I certainly am not. Can someone please help me with my dilemma?
Note: I edited this message down to focus on the key points.
All right, first of all I’m not qualified to go head to head with your dad given that he’s a Psychiatrist. If this is his opinion and he isn’t going to budge, then I’m not sure I can sway him. I don’t deal with raw data, I’m only barely interested in the studies and I advise based on the fact that I’m a life long gamer and I’ve worked with children, and I’ve devoted 6 years to studying these topics and talking to parents all over the country.
In my defense, I am endorsed by the National PTA and the American Library Association. Both don’t have any problems with my philosophy and have been comfortable with my stance. Further let me add that I do consult with two practicing PhD Psychologists and one Psychiatrist. One of the Psychologists also specializes in addiction and I grant that these two fields are different. All are relatively young, which means they believe less in the established theory. So you’ve got that versus your father’s expert experience.
So, let me address your father. Doctor. I very respectably disagree with your premise. First of all, I believe the APA has concluded that games are not addictive. In fact, from what I hear the new school of thought is that addiction doesn’t result from video games, the Internet and possibly other things because the root of the problem is in the person’s personality. People who I’ve met who claim an addiction to video games are also people who tend to have a problem with reality. Like books, TV, movies, sex and drugs like cannibis are now thought, by some in his profession, to be simply the symptom, or the way the addiction manifests. Its not that a person is obsessed with gaming, so much as its a person who is avoiding reality, stress or boredom. I believe that video game addicts 20 years ago would be addicted to VHS movies. Ten years before that it might be Rock n’ Roll and back in the 50’s it was comic books. Dr. Fredrick Wertham, a notorious psychiatrist, opined in his book “Seduction of the Innocent” that comics were leading to juvenile delinquency. I don’t know how many people believe this today but it’s worth noting that the good doctor redacted most of his theory before his death and… well… when’s the last time you heard comics blamed for societies ills. Video games, being new and outside the experience of most professionals and parents, leads to misunderstandings.
I mean in the 18th century the Waltz was blamed for causing women to be depraved and I’m convinced that after the first caveman made the first violent cave painting – someone said “think of the children!”
So, I don’t believe, and neither do my advisors, that video games are any more dangerous than any other media. I’ll also add that kids who play games for the gore and violence are rare and probably should be watched. Most kids play gory and violent games for the same reason people see horror movies and ride rollercoasters. To me, saying that a violent game will make you kill in real life – or even become callous – is the same as suggesting that I a love of rollercoasters will lead to reckless driving. The experience is the controlled fear. To put it simply, a child doesn’t think KILL KILL KILL so much as he thinks SURVIVE. These games are skill challenges only they create the illusion of realism and they actually do challenge in a way that playing Cops and Robbers doesn’t. The violence and gore make it seem more real, which ratchets up the tension and scariness. It makes it all more thrilling.
Look at Paintball. Paintball players don’t honestly want to hurt people, they want to win the match and not get shot. It’s about competition, not killing. Despite the “guns,” the military accoutrements and the seemingly violent nature of the game, it’s hard to argue that people play Paintball to be violent. That’s just not how the game is played.
That said I understand why some parents don’t like Call of Duty Modern Warfare 1 or 2 because there are real wars going on and the realism players crave scares people who don’t crave the challenge of surviving in a simulation of war. It’s difficult to understand for some. One way to help is, a movie goer watches a James Bond film for escapism and thrills. A gamer looks at the movie and thinks “I want to do that.” Do they want to put their lives at risk? No, no more than the actors in the movie want to really be shot and killed. But pretending to be James Bond in a game? Yeah, sounds fun!
All that said…
Your father has the final say. Maybe I’ve swayed him or maybe not. The fact is, he has every right to take the game from you. In 3 years? Not so much maybe. After you move out? Not at all. But I don’t believe for a second that the game is going to turn you into a zombie or a killer – or even that you’ll become obsessed. And the only reason you might become addicted is if you already have some “Real world” problems that need escaping from. Again, anyone with perspective on life with ambition is not going to be sucked into a simulation. The addiction comes from people who are trying to escape their lives in some way. And as I said, that can manifest in lots of ways.
I also suggest your father read GRAND THEFT CHILDHOOD (written by two PhDs) and maybe Stephen Johnson’s EVERYTHING BAD IS GOOD FOR YOU. I think, again with respect, that your father’s view isn’t on the cutting edge and as young gamers become parents, all these video game issues will become less serious. Does your dad think movies are addictive? How about books? In my less that perfect childhood I read a lot of books. Lots of hours of the day, but just because they were books nobody accused me of being addicted. I was encouraged. If I’d chosen TV, my mom would have had similar fears your dad has.
Again, this is your dad’s call and you should respect his decision. Maybe have him read this – and if he wants to refute it I will publish whatever he wants to say – and see if maybe he’ll take a softer stance. CODMW2 is a very good game. Well made, great storylines and, yeah, lots of simulated violence to challenge the player. I personally don’t have a problem with a 15 year old playing personally but if video games were the scourge some believe….
Then why is the crime rate down in the 30 years since gaming was invented? I’m not saying games lowered the murder rate, but they certainly didn’t increase it. Something like 85% of young adults play games, so where’s the huge epidemic?
Anyway, good luck Wasif. I encourage your dad to read this and respect that he has a 15-year old son who has the good judgment and thoughtfulness to craft this letter, and try and persuade you, rather than defy you. Seems to me, you’ve got a good kid there. But I’ll defer to your opinion because you are the dad and I’d never want to undermine a father’s judgment, even if I disagree with it.
Thanks for the letter.
January 21st, 2010 at 8:00 pm
I’d love to see the reply posted here, if there is one…
January 23rd, 2010 at 12:10 pm
Well said. People like this father, while full of good intentions, simply do not look at the data. Countless studies have been done/are being done on adolescents, gaming and the potential benefits or drawbacks and the data almost always points to benefits. In fact, one study (Quiroga, M. A., Herranz, M., Gomez-Abad, M., Ruiz, J., & Colom, R. (2009). Video-games: Do they require general intelligence? Computers & Education, 53(2), 414-418. doi: 10:1016/j.compedu.20090.02.017) points to gamers being simply more intelligent than non-gamers as they require more problem solving skills. Children, adolescents in particular, really can tell the difference between fantasy violence and real violence. Anyone that contests that are either a) simply ignorant of child development or b) promoting an agenda.
Anyway, nice post. (Your copyright notice at the bottom should probably be updated to 2010… it says 2003-2008 right now. Just FYI.)
🙂
January 25th, 2010 at 9:42 am
I don’t think games are as harmful as some think. Nor do I think they are as harmless as some think.
I think the sides polarize the issue. It’s more about the subtle influence and subtle training one undergoes while playing a game.
The notion that everything can be solved from the sofa is a lesson you learn by playing alot of videogames. There’s alot of other more subtle negatives too. EVerything is solvable. Everything is win or lose. Everything is fair and you can win if you just try.
ON the other hand there are positives and games certainly aren’t training you to be a killer. The positives involve hand-eye coordination and fine digit movement. Visual perception. Rudimentary puzzle solving. Teamwork building in more serious mp games.
GAmes can be masturbatory or be very social too.
It seems to me the more you play games the more you’ll get both positive and negative reinforcement. And overall it is most prudent to monitor the time spent on this hobby.
My off-the-cuff in-the-works theory.
January 25th, 2010 at 1:25 pm
“The notion that everything can be solved from the sofa is a lesson you learn by playing alot of videogames. There’s alot of other more subtle negatives too. EVerything is solvable. Everything is win or lose. Everything is fair and you can win if you just try.” -Freakhead
I’m not entirely sure of that. Using as an example this post’s game in question, Modern Warfare 2, the amount of moral and ethical ambiguity in the game pretty much negates this. Games like this are indicative of our postmodernity: the complexity of every aspect of our lives is so vast and unrealizable, the chaos is so thick, that nothing is as simple as win or lose.
Too much of anything is bad for you, video games very much included. Thankfully, as augmented reality becomes more sophisticated, we’ll start to see games that get you off the couch and into the world (for, among other things–heaven forbid!–exercise).
January 26th, 2010 at 8:35 pm
I find Gamerdad’s comments helpful, and those who also commented. . However, while reading books as a child doesn’t make one an addict, it could certainly develop skills that will make you more employable and likely improve your chance of succeeding in school. With that said, my question is whether it is fair to my relatively mature 11 year old to allow him to purchase this game and spend time playing it when he really needs more exercise and less time in front of the tv. Also, will this game contribute to teaching him to minimize the seriousness of ‘war’, particularly when I would be happy for him to serve in the military someday? Last, his 9 year old brother already thinks he can do anything his brother does, so is this game to much for a 9 year who while he has read most of Harry Potter, still is a little boy. I know very little about this game and was initially dead set against until my 11 year old son put me on the computer to search out some help. Any insight would be appreciated
January 27th, 2010 at 12:02 am
Lets take your points one-by-one.
“However, while reading books as a child doesn’t make one an addict, it could certainly develop skills that will make you more employable and likely improve your chance of succeeding in school.”
Good point, but the truth is we never know what’s going to be the next thing in employment. As it turns out, and not just because I write about games, the Apple IIe my parents got me as a child – and the text based and logic games I played – prepared me quite well for the IT revolution. Orthopedic surgeons claim that video games makes the fine motor and remote control easier. I believe the future will involve a lot of “people doing things remotely” and the games of today are preparing for that future. Also, when you have an entire generation developing a skill at something, that skill tends to lead innovation for the generations to come.
“With that said, my question is whether it is fair to my relatively mature 11 year old to allow him to purchase this game and spend time playing it when he really needs more exercise and less time in front of the tv. Also, will this game contribute to teaching him to minimize the seriousness of ‘war’, particularly when I would be happy for him to serve in the military someday?”
The game is rated for 18 year olds. I think 14 is okay. I MIGHT let my son play something like this at 11, but maybe not. So I can’t recommend it for your son – and especially not for the 9-year old. It won’t warp them but, well, there’s plenty of time for violent games later. As far as “WAR” goes, kids tend know what’s real and what’s not. If anything the game might inspire your son to join the military later – with a better idea of what’s in store.
” Last, his 9 year old brother already thinks he can do anything his brother does,”
OH tell me about it! I think 9 is too young to even watch, but you can’t protect them forever. If you already let him see R-rated stuff – for violence – then this won’t shock him. I still can’t recommend 9 for this one.
Oh yes, the exercise point. I’m betting you have a PS3 or Xbox 360 here, so the range of exercise games is limited. Maybe make him a deal? For every 1/2 he spends exercising somehow – he gets an hour of game time.
This is called “Using their passion against them” and it’s a good compromise, should you go that route. Good luck!
January 29th, 2010 at 10:52 pm
I’ve said this before(Im 14 by the way) one person can not judge another person’s media intake. The reason is one person can’t ever understand what a another person’s maturity level or toleration level is. What i’m saying is this: say a 12 year lod see’s COD and GTA and he says hmmm I think I can handle COD, but I personly know i cant handle GTA yet. So he asks his parent for COD. Their response is: NOOOO! Your to young and immature!. One Person can’t judge another and vice versa
January 31st, 2010 at 11:09 pm
We were thinking of buying Modern Warfare 2 at Christmas as I have three avid gamer kids in my family, the youngest is an 11yr old boy. In the end we decided against it, not because we thought it was too violent but because we thought it would be too immersive. We just wanted to keep the 11 year old away from the large online games for a few more years yet, especially after watching my older kids get totally sucked into WOW and Call of Duty 1.
I’m just not sure that getting heavily immersed into a particularly violent game at a young age is a good thing really. A child may be ok with the violence but they are not always ready for some of the more adult scenarios in the game.
Having said that I have seen with my own eyes how much fun my older kids get from the social interaction and clever strategizing from the large MMORPG games. When they are playing they do exhibit addictive behaviors, no doubt about that, but they have also formed some amazing friendships and lifelong friends through doing it. My eldest son, now 20, doesn’t play as much these days, but at the time it was a really important part of his social life.
Just found your blog – great reading – thanks!
February 1st, 2010 at 3:05 pm
If your already questioning your dad’s guidance for you and your only 11, You teen years are going to be very long and very hard. Forget about the game and move on.
There is much more to life than video games.
February 1st, 2010 at 6:49 pm
Amused, you’re obviously forgetting what it is to be young. Also, the kid in the original post is fifteen, not eleven. No other eleven-year-old mentioned in this post or the comments is questioning anyone’s guidance.
Certainly there is more to live than video games but some of us make our livings designing them, developing them, playing and writing about them. Who knows; maybe our industrious fifteen-year-old will turn out the same.
February 8th, 2010 at 8:32 am
a very thoughtful and respectful answer. i depend on your input for the choices i make for my 11 yr. old son. you rock